Friday, September 12, 2008

2nd Annual Liberty Alliance Tokyo Cup

I am happy to announce that, due to the unparalled lack of interest in the previous match, organizers have decided to put on the '2nd Annual Liberty Alliance Tokyo Cup', to be held following the November Liberty Alliance meetings in Tokyo Japan.

The match will take place Thursday November 6th. The location will not be announced till match day, to keep down the riff raff and papparazi.

Acknowledging that any football pitch sized piece of land in downtown Tokyo already has 6-7 office buildings and a temple, organizers have decided that the game will be a futsal match. Futsal is a fast-paced 5-a-side indoor variation of football, known for its exciting foot-work, quick passing and attractive referees.

Futsal has quickly become very popular amongst SAML & Liberty proponents. Fans of other football variations point to the fact that the rules run to 72 pages as a representative of the complexity and bloat of futsal, and advocate simpler alternatives. Indeed, games such as 'balancing on one foot' and 'standing around staring at each other' are very popular in some locales - typically those without the resources to buy balls, goal nets and other equipment.

Work is under way to reconcile these differences. Proponents of the various Somewhat Silly Football Variations (SSFV) recognize that, unless the community can present to the market a cohesive & integrated approach to SSFV , the viewing public will look elsewhere for entertainment, leaving the door open for competing sports - such as Somewhat Silly Cricket Variations (SSCV) like baseball. And nobody wants that to happen.

Organizers of the Liberty Tokyo match have announced a strict drug & alcohol policy, namely that all participants MUST  partake in one or the other - either during or directly following the match. Random urine testing of all participants is expected (beginning as of today).

Conor "One-Sock" Cahill, when asked whether he would be participating, responded 'Only if I can get an upgrade to First. Currently, I'm booked in business on a Triple 7 in from SFO, but I'm trying to switch that because I'm in seat 4A and I hate that seat because the power plug is about 2 inches too high and I have to unbuckle my seatbelt to reach it. I generally like 3F but the window shade was broken last time and the sun woke me up, even though I had taken my Ambien.'

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